And because today is Friday

And because today is Friday

We are almost entering the month of Christmas, which this year happens to be on December 25th. As such, let’s hope for a time of peace (which is a good time for that), friendship between Uber and taxi drivers, fraternity among the people of the Middle East, and an atmosphere of love in Parliament. And as it’s dinner season, this year we have Trump and Putin, we already have an explosive red… have a good weekend!





 Inside the ZIP there are more than 100 FANTASTIC images (for bearded men and good-humored people), here's an invitation for you to take out and see all the images.


And because today is Friday v879 (20MB)


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JOKES WITH HUMOR






The son asks his father:
- Dad, are all women's breasts the same?
- No, my son... There are breasts of different shapes and types... apple-like, pear-like, onion-like...
- So what are the differences?
- The apple-type ones are round, hard...
- And the pear type?
- They are also round, more or less hard and narrower at the tip.
- And the onion type?
- Look son, these are exactly like your mother's. Every time I look at them, it makes me want to cry!!!










Mary Magdalene was about to be stoned when Jesus decided to intercede on her behalf before the crowd that was there.
And Jesus said:
- Whoever has never made a mistake, cast the first stone.
An Alentejo man, naturally present in all places and times, got excited, picked up a huge brick and hit Maria Madalena in the forehead, who fell hard.
Jesus, very saddened, went towards the Alentejo man, looked him straight in the eyes and asked:
- My son, tell me the truth... have you never made a mistake in your life?
The Alentejo resident replied:
- At this distance, Master? ...never!










A lawyer was driving distractedly, when at a stop sign, he passed without stopping, right in front of a GNR vehicle.
Prompted to stop:
- Well, good afternoon... please, please, your documents...
- But why, sir? guard? Did I do something wrong?
- He didn't stop at the stop sign, back there.
- I slowed down... and as no one came...
- Exactly... your documents please...
- But Mr. Does the guard perhaps know the legal difference between stopping and slowing down?
- The difference is that the law says that at a stop sign, the vehicle must come to a complete stop... documents fáchavor!
- Or not, sir. guard. I am a lawyer and I know your limitations in interpreting legal texts. I propose the following... if you can explain to me the legal difference between stopping and slowing down, I will show you the documents and you can fine me. Otherwise, I'll leave without a fine!
- Affirmative, I agree... can you please get out of the car, sir? attorney?
The lawyer then gets out of his vehicle, the GNR patrol takes out their clubs, and it's a beating that even boils over the lawyer. Punches from all sides, licks, kicks...
The lawyer screams for help, and begs them to stop... and the GNR asks:
- Do you want me to stop or slow down???
- Looks like it! It seems! It seems!
- Affirmative... do you have your documents???










This section has the support of our reader João Pimentel






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