Many get stuck on the third, but why?

After 40 years of research, psychologist Jed Diamond came to the conclusion that most people do indeed find the “love of their life” at some point, but most often they stay without it because they get stuck at the third of the five stages that every love relationship goes through.

Falling in love

Most love relationships begin with a “drowsy” phase, that is, a period in which we seem to be floating in the clouds. Then you still idealize your new partner and the world seems rosy. We place all our wishes and hopes in our partner. He quickly becomes ideal – there are simply no flaws. You believe that he will be with you forever, you believe in everything he says. You believe so much in the power of true love that nothing can make you stop or be more careful.

You become a couple

In this phase, love becomes more mature, calm and stable, some even move in together. You get to know each other better and your presence has an impact on all parts of your partner’s life. This can take several years, and then most often there is a wedding and the expansion of the family. The couple feels safe, loved, satisfied and enjoys their togetherness. You believe that you have found the right person and that your relationship is destined.

Dispelling illusions

The third stage is the most critical and that’s when hopes start to dwindle. It is a period in which it seems to most that there is no more passion, that the partner has become predictable, and little things start to get on their nerves, thoughts of breaking up arise. Everything often ends with the conclusion that there is no point in struggling because you are clearly not for each other, no matter how many years you have spent together.

Creating true love

Those couples who survive the critical third phase can see the fruits in the fourth. The illusion is gone, and the person next to you is real, not the way you imagined it, and that’s okay, because you’ve accepted it as such and love it with all its faults and virtues. Now it’s time for healing and the final phase.

Using your power as money to change the world

In the fifth and final stage, if the relationship has survived everything that life has brought it up to that point, a deep and strong connection has already developed between the partners who have the feeling that, as long as they are together, they can do whatever they set their mind to. You are no longer together for just that long, but have a higher purpose. Love is no longer an end in itself, but you as a couple have common goals, plans and desires, and all those little things that bothered you in the third phase now seem insignificant and childish. It is also the phase when partners usually realize that they have really found the love of their life, they write Independent newspaper.

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