Can we take a minute to talk about how nothing beautifies a sex life like the white walls of Mykonos…or the sands of Greek beaches…or a cozy cabin on Kopaonik with a crackling fireplace?
If the mere idea of these locations (where I’m assuming you don’t live full-time) puts you in the mood, you’ve probably experienced some fantastic vacation sex. Compared to the usual coitus at home, which I guess we’re supposed to do, vacation sex tends to be a little more consistent and surprisingly spicy than you’re likely to experience during a regular week at home. And, there is a certain psychology that explains why this is so.
The guiding premise behind vacation sex veers into self-expansion theory, which supports the idea that novelty can fuel excitement in your relationship. When you focus on expanding your (sexual) horizons or, in essence, trying new things as a couple, the result can include an improved relationship and increased sexual well-being.
And on a side note, introducing an element of novelty into life also distorts the brain’s perception of the passage of time in such a way that things seem to move more slowly. So when you’re doing something outside of your normal schedule and routine, the cramps can also feel longer, whether they actually are or not.
Since you probably don’t have the unlimited funds and vacation days needed to be on a plane all the time, the idea of having great sex only on vacation probably doesn’t satisfy you. Because, quite simply, you’re not on vacation as often as you deserve to have amazing vacation-style sex.
Until that moment, is it possible to capture that mood on, say, a regular, no less special Tuesday? According to psychotherapist and certified sexologist Dr. Lorel Stajnberg, yes (yikes): Hello, themed evening!
“People can have different feelings about a location based on what they do there. A change of feeling could encourage excitement and create novelty in the bedroom.” —sexologist Dr. Laurel Steinberg
“Couples can go out for Cuban food followed by salsa dancing, or French food and a French movie to feel immersed in a foreign culture,” says Dr. Steinberg. “What’s interesting is that I’ve found that people can have very different feelings about a location based on what they do when they’re there. A change in feeling could encourage excitement and create novelty in the bedroom.”
If you’re committed to a theme night, consider venturing far outside your comfort zone to access that holiday-worthy novelty (ie, give yourself a break at an Italian restaurant). Make new memories, then go home and make more new memories.
And if this all seems a little cheesy, let’s rephrase it: You know how a trip to Provence can inspire you to learn more about wine while you’re there, or to go rock climbing just when you go to Tara? Dr. Steinberg recommends getting off the couch and embracing an adventurous date no matter where you are. “Activities that are out of the ordinary for the couple will make it look like they’re on vacation,” she says.
And by the way, let’s not ignore the connection between adrenaline and excitement. If you do something a little bolder, you may be neurologically and physically inclined to bring that excitement-seeking energy into the bedroom.
I understand that nothing will directly compare to that magical night you and your partner shared in Palma de Mallorca, Monaco or Bali. But the idea of bringing that vacation energy into your daily (or at least weekly) sex life? Sounds worthy of a bedroom passport stamp to me.
Source: www.sitoireseto.com
