A breakup is one of life’s most difficult experiences. And few will be spared, but relationships that last until death right away can only be found in fairy tales. Everyone then copes differently – some cry, others try to clear their heads with work or physical activity. Still, there are differences between how women and men experience a breakup. While women often openly vent their emotions, men tend to hide their feelings, which in the end usually doesn’t help themselves much, because the pain is the same, it just lasts longer.
How women and men cope with a breakup
The typical image of women after a breakup, often portrayed in movies, involves crying, sharing emotions with female friends, and gradual rebirth.
And are we far from the truth? Women allow themselves to be vulnerable. He can afford it. No one will judge them for it. And it helps to cope with the breakup faster. On the contrary, men tend to be portrayed as those who have a few beers with friends and quickly get over everything. However, the reality is different.
According to a study by the University of Lancaster, men often suffer more than women, even if it is not visible at first glance. While women experience intense grief in the first months after a breakup, men often realize what they have lost only after some time has passed. This difference is also confirmed by relationship coach Jana Řehulková, who emphasizes that men often withdraw into themselves and put on a mask of calmness and composure, while women allow themselves to experience their emotions to the fullest, that is, the way it should be.
Social expectations and the male mask
The primary reason why men hide their emotions is because of societal norms. From childhood, many boys are taught that “boys don’t cry” and “men must be strong.” This upbringing often forces them to suppress their feelings and pretend that everything is fine, even when it is not. For a broken man arouses ridicule and contempt. A broken woman inspires compassion. In short, women have more support from their surroundings – friends, colleagues or family expect them to share their emotions, which helps them cope with the breakup more quickly.
Breakup and Age: How Men Cope at Different Life Stages
The way in which men handle a breakup is often also derived from their age and life situation. Young men in their 20s and 30s often perceive the end of a relationship as the loss of not only their partner, but also their ideas of a perfect life. They are trying to start over – whether through dating, career or other activities. And they have plenty of time for it.
Middle-aged men (30-50 years old) face not only emotional but also woefully practical problems that their younger colleagues do not yet have. Children, property, work. For them, breaking up can mean a sense of failure as a partner or even as a father.
Older men (50+) often do not know what will actually happen next. For them, a breakup means not only the end of a relationship, but also a loss of security and fear of the rest of their life alone. However, if they find the courage to start over, they may be surprised at what else they can experience.
Advice for men on how to cope with a breakup
1. Accept your emotions
It’s perfectly okay to feel sad, disappointed, angry, or even desperate. Suppressing feelings can lead to long-term problems such as depression or feelings of emptiness. Allow yourself to experience the pain, it will heal you.
2. Share your feelings
Talking about your emotions is not a weakness, but rather a sign of courage. Confide in a close friend, family member or professional – such as a therapist. Sharing will help ease the burden you carry..
3. Take your time
Healing after a breakup is not a race. Everyone needs a different amount of time to come to terms with the end of a relationship. Don’t try to speed it up by pretending or rushing into a new relationship. Give yourself space for yourself and your thoughts.
4. Avoid impulsive decisions
After a breakup, it can be tempting to look for a quick fix — for example, starting a new relationship, moving house, or making a major life change. However, these steps often do not bring long-term satisfaction and can make the situation even more complicated. Better to be calm and focus on stabilizing your life.
5. Take care of your body and mind
Physical activity, such as sports or even simple walks, can help relieve stress and improve mood. At the same time, try to devote time to activities that you enjoy and fulfill.
6. Don’t be afraid of professional help
If you feel that you cannot cope with the breakup on your own, do not be afraid to seek out a therapist or coach. A professional can help you better understand yourself and find a way forward.
Source: zpravy.tiscali.cz
