Unspoken messages in the mutual communication of people began to be studied only in the sixties of the twentieth century. The public was introduced to this topic in 1970, when Julius Fast published a book on body language.
Scientist Albert Mehrabian discovered that one human message contains 7% spoken influence (only words), 38% vocal (tone of voice, modulation) and 55% unspoken (facial expressions, gestures). Professor Birdwhistell estimated that the average person utters words only ten or eleven minutes a day, and that the average sentence lasts 2.5 seconds.
Most researchers agree in the conclusion that we use speech primarily to convey information, while gestures and movements serve to convey our mood.
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Surely you are familiar with the situation when someone tells you something, and you have a “gut feeling” that it is not really true?
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Some people are often said to be “intuitive”. They have a developed ability to find out what a person’s gestures and facial expressions mean and compare that knowledge with what that person is saying. If the body language is inconsistent with the spoken sentences, we can assume that the person is lying.
Women are often said to have better developed intuition.
They have a well-developed ability to collect and interpret the unspoken signals of the interlocutor, as well as having a very well-expressed sense of detail and recognizing almost imperceptible facial expressions.
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This female intuition comes to the fore especially in women who have just given birth. In the first years, mothers communicate with their children mostly non-verbally, because this is the only way a small child can express himself.
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Take some time to observe other people’s body expressions, but also be aware of your own movements and body language during communication.
In the beginning, you will certainly make a little more effort, but as you pay more and more attention to it, it will become easier for you and eventually this skill will grow into automaticity. You will learn a lot more about people through body language than you can just by listening to what they say.
That way, you will have much more space to influence others.
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Ideal places for this kind of exercise are those where people gather and socialize: receptions, airports, business meetings, cafes. And television is a great place to study body language. Turn down the volume for a while and just observe the movements and facial expressions of the people appearing on television. It won’t take you long to figure out what’s going on even though you can’t hear what they’re talking about.
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