After Happiness : The Big Book of HappinessLeo Bormans, researcher at the University of Rotterdam, author of international bestsellers, returns to the notion of happiness with The New Big Book of Happiness (Les éditions de l’Homme). He shares philosophical advice from more than a hundred positive psychology experts from all four corners of the globe.
The problem in our world is that too many people expect too much from life and set themselves “goals” and “conditions” to be happy. However, happiness is much less complex than that! It lies in a healthy lifestyle (it’s difficult to be very happy without taking maximum care of yourself), in the ability to put things into perspective, in the people around you and the pleasure of sharing good times, in sexuality too (love life is also part of happiness), but above all, in simplicity.
To help you see things more clearly, and perhaps to unravel the mystery of the -oh so sought-after- happiness, Top Santé has drawn four lessons (not exhaustive) from this inspiring new book. Preview.
It’s rarely as serious as you think.
“Our dissatisfaction is usually not as terrible as we think.” says Mathieu Perona, co-author of the national report Well-being in France. For several years, he has been analyzing the results of quarterly national surveys on subjective well-being. When we are unhappy or dissatisfied, we have the impression that nothing is going well. However, surveys show that it is very likely that certain aspects of our life fully satisfy us. Obviously, the goal is not to ignore the problems, but to combat our feeling of helplessness and take advantage of what is going well in our life.
Happiness and hospitality
Happiness is certainly an individual experience, but it is also a group phenomenon, says Robert Biswas-Diener, who has traveled the world in search of the essence of happiness. In modern times, we tend to think of hospitality as an economic activity: restaurants, hotels, etc. But in ancient times, hospitality was simply an attitude of welcome: welcoming strangers or friends and providing them with shelter, security, food and entertainment. Try to take a broader view of hospitality today: like welcoming rival fans or new work colleagues. You will see how it affects your relationships and your well-being.
One finding: Hospitality is directly linked to happiness. Analyses reveal that it is associated with the experience of more pleasant emotions, a feeling of increased trust, lower rates of loneliness and greater optimism.
Sexual happiness
Fostering and maintaining sexual happiness is an integral part of human flourishing and a satisfying life, says Thomas Wilke, who has dedicated his career to advancing knowledge in this area. In our society, we are increasingly faced with factors like stress, anxiety and lack of connection that can interfere with sexual happiness.
Yet, it is still possible to maintain happiness and joy in your intimate life, by developing healthier attitudes towards your sexuality. Prioritize open communication with your partner, take the time to understand your body, your desires, foster a strong emotional connection with your spouse and stay informed about sexual health, consent and the different aspects of human sexuality.
A simple happiness
“Often people consider happiness as something special.,” say Namhee Kim and Inchoel Choi of the Center for Happiness in Seoul.We have all come to understand how important it is to find happiness in the ordinary moments of everyday life.”.
Happiness does not require a magic potion or something extraordinary. It lies in what is simple: let us remember a typical day when we felt sincerely happy. Let us reflect on the moments, the people who were with us and the activities that gave us joy.
Maintain a daily routine: Happiness does not require a specific event. It comes from simple actions aimed at leading your daily life in the right way. Prioritize good sleep and nutritious food. Cultivate friendships. Do things for others, but don’t overdo it.
A lesson from the happiest country
Finland remains at the top of the list of happiest countries for the sixth year in a row (according to the United Nations World Happiness Report). Heli Koivumaa-Honkanen, a psychiatrist in Kuopio, talks about the importance of his family in his happiness.I wouldn’t be myself without my family, my friends, my childhood librarian, my sports partners, my many teachers… We all need support to grow but also enough courage to move forward.”.
She advocates being grateful and compassionate and cultivating the prerequisites for good mental health: healthy relationships, physical well-being and a balanced lifestyle. Take care of yourself, but also ask for help when needed. Finally, cultivate curiosity!There is always something to be learned from the experiences, courage and dreams of your family, friends and humanity.”.
Source: www.topsante.com
